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Oh, Pretty Woman Night Train


Something's Wrong With Me is the eighth episode of ALF's second season. It originally aired on November 9, 1987.

Something's Wrong With Me

Plot Summary[]

ALF gets a severe case of hiccups after being excluded from Dorothy and Whizzer's wedding party. According to Melmacian medicine there are two cures: fresh Cat juice and something so disgusting that ALF does not want to mention it. In order to save the wedding, the Tanners try to give him fake Cat juice as a placebo. It works until he learns that it is fake, and is forced to eat the other cure... raw spinach

Teaser[]

Dorothy is visiting and announces to the family that she has gotten engaged to Whizzer and wants the wedding at the Tanner's house

Act One[]

Willie is on the phone with a tailor to rent a tuxedo, and ALF has drunk all the bottled water that was intended for the wedding guests, to cure his hiccups. He warns that they could last a long time because his uncle Tinkle had them for 50 years. The family has tried many ways to cure his hiccups, including ALF eating raw turkey. and the next morning the family doesn't get much sleep. Brian asks for some coffee. Trevor comes over to mention that Raquel could hear ALF's hiccups, and noticed the turkey bones on his lawn. ALF then notices that his hiccups can shatter glass (just like Ella Fitzgerarald)


ALF is searching through his things to find his Melmacian encyclopedia to find a cure for the hiccups, and also mistakes his box of crayons for leftover nuclear waste from his spaceship. Reading it he discovers that the cure is fresh cat juice, to which the family balks. There is an alternate cure which ALF refuses to reveal saying "it's disgusting"


Kate and Lucky are in the living room and ALF greets him as "Juicy" Willie comes home and mentions that all the churches are booked, except for the Malibu Nudist Chapel. ALF's hiccups are getting worse and causing more things to break

Act Two[]

While the family is preparing for the wedding, Dorothy and Whizzer come over, and Whizzer heads out to his bachelor party. He mentions they'll be watching a stag movie and hiring a stripper. Dorothy hears ALF's hiccups and when she finds out it may happen at the wedding, she suggests that they shoot him. ALF reminds her that he was the one who got them together in the first place.. Dorothy says that since things are desperate that they give him cat juice, but just a placebo with something else.


ALF is in the garage, then Kate, Dorothy and Willie come in with a mug of the fake cat juice. ALF is told that it's not Lucky but a stray but wonders if it's Kosher. He drinks it then stops hiccuping. The next day the wedding is on and the guests arrive. Lynn has a video camera to film the event, and Whizzer to fill in as best man for Garland, as he went home with the stripper. During the vows, ALF is hiding in the kitchen and his sobs can be heard in the living room. Willie goes into the kitchen to get him, but he flees into the garage. Willie and Lynn catch up to him, and Willie reminds him what could happen if he's seen. Lynn slips and says their caring is why they gave him that "fake cat juice" Realizing that he was fooled, ALF's hiccups come back and he can be heard inside the house. Dorothy leave for the garage and tells Whizzer to sing while they talk to ALF. They demand he reveal the other cure, and he says that it's eating raw spinach. Dorothy says they'll go to Plan B (which involves gunfire) if ALF refuses to eat the spinach. He tries to sneak out. Lynn arrives with the spinach and mentions that the best man arrived with the stripper. Dorothy demands he eat it


Epilogue[]

After the wedding the guests leave, Dorothy and Whizzer announce they are going to Tijuana for their honeymoon. He almost throws still in the box rice at them not knowing you have to take it out of the box first. He then mentions that he expects that it's not also tradition to tie a cat to the back of the car either, to which Lynn is asked to cut Lucky loose

Quotes[]

  • ALF: Traditions are like plates: they're made to be broken.


  • Willie: Say what's this?
  • ALF: Oh, that's just nuclear waste for my spaceship. Hey, don't worry. Life on this planet will exist as long as that little lid doesn't pop off.
  • (The lid has come off. Willie is terrified)
  • ALF: (looking inside) Oh, wait a minute. These are my crayons.

Title Reference[]

"Something's Wrong With Me" was a 1972 Austin Roberts song.

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